Brief Thoughts on New Social Media Laws, Screen Time Guilt, and Algorithm Experiments
Patrick takes a trip around the internet, and comes back with a handful of stories relevant to the modern parent.
There are many stories that I, sadly, do not have time to pursue, or there isn’t enough there there to demand a full article. These ideas start piling up in my inbox, shuffled away to be ignored. Why not, it occurred to me recently, simply share them here?
So, here are three stories that caught my eye this week. And by caught my eye, that usually means it caused me to nearly toss my phone across the screen in annoyance or disgust. You’re welcome to send over suggestions for future stories by emailing me.
On the docket today: states passing social media laws around algorithms, feeling guilt around using screen time, and the catastrophic harm social platforms are causing.
Headline: “Pritzker signs law regulating how social media platforms interact with children” (ABC 7) // “NY’s new social media rules for protecting children are now in place: What you need to know” (NY Daily News)
How Much This Story Upsets Me: 5/10
To limit the addictive nature of social media feeds, the law prohibits companies from using a minor’s viewing history or data stored on the device to determine what shows up in their feeds. Instead, feeds for minors will only be allowed to show information the user requested or searched for or was posted by a creator the user follows. Kids will also be able to see media that is a direct, private message to them.
“These are common sense protections,” Pritzker said. “They don’t prevent young people from connecting with one another or their loved ones online. They don’t censor anyone. They take decisions about children’s online safety away from the companies and put it back in the hands of parents.”
My Thoughts: What we’re seeing is the natural consequence of social media and technology companies spending the past decade and change extracting and exploiting people in pursuit of profit and without consequences. We’re now seeing a hodge hodge of countries, states, schools, and other institutions toss out good and bad faith measures pitched as attaching “responsibility” to various online platforms in our lives.
There was never a world where these companies, whose business model is built on exploitation, was going to do this on their own. But it’s also true many “protect the children” efforts are likely to accomplish few of their promised goals. It’s about control. It’s saying you’re “doing something.” But…ugh. The desperation is real, and the prospect of doing nothing feels like a trap, too. The best time for change was 10 years ago, the next best time for change is right now, even if it’s messy along the way.
Algorithms can be useful. They can also be annoying. Destructive. Addictive. It does make sense to have limitations. It makes sense to give everyone the opportunity to ditch the algorithm. Please, I follow these people because I’m interested in seeing what they have to say. The “For You” page on X/Twitter is full of the worst stuff imaginable and shouldn’t be the default, but I do like that it’s an algorithmic option.
Algorithms, at their core, are studying you. When put in those terms, why don’t those companies have to ask permission, with kids especially? Why can’t you put limits on it? I like, for example, that I can limit (or turn off) YouTube Shorts for my oldest.
More of that!
Headline: “Born Interactive: For Gen Alpha, Screentime Is a Part of Life” (Lingokids)
How Much This Story Upsets Me: 3/10
“According to a recent study from kids’ entertainment platform Lingokids, Illinois parents are: More likely to use screentime as a reward or incentive; 20% more likely to give kids screens in the car; 18.8% more likely to work during their kids’ screentime.
Other key findings from the study: 84% of parents feel guilt about screentime, up from 74% last year; 9 out of 10 parents say screentime can be quality time; 95% of parents extend screentime limits at least sometimes.”
My Thoughts: For a long time, when we would drive to Wisconsin—a little more than an hour—we would give the kids the option to use their tablet either driving there or driving back. Not both. Often, they would defer to driving back, and if we were lucky, they were so exhausted by the weekend’s swimming events that they’d just take a nap.
My youngest has developed motion sickness in the car. (Like mother, like daughter.) Wearing wristbands has helped matters, but the iPad is no longer allowed in the car under (almost) any circumstances. The car is also the last place my youngest will make a nap, which means we simply ask our oldest to patiently wait until said nap arrives, at which point they can, if they’ve made the decision to, begin poking away at the tablet.
Look, there’s enough throwing up in the house. We don’t need more of it.
While these findings come from a company who produces children’s apps that, in their words, are “designed by parents and educators to make play purposeful,” it rings true. I might make a better dinner because I’ve given my kids another 15 minutes, I might write on Crossplay that that you should not (generally) feel guilty about screen time, but I can’t hide being proud when my kids make it 24 hours without screen time.
That guilt is silly. But I think most parents, even informed parents, feel it. It’s normal.
Headline: “TikTok Withheld a Safety Feature From Millions. One Died by Suicide ” (Bloomberg)
How Much This Story Upsets Me: 10/10
“When TikTok tweaked its algorithm in 2021 to stop users from being overwhelmed with harmful content, the company didn’t roll out the safer version to everyone, a confidential internal document shows. Instead, to see if the change might reduce the app’s stickiness, the company conducted an experiment. It created a control group of 10% of US users — at the time, that would have been about 15 million people — who kept the old version of the app. This group, according to the document, included 16-year-old Chase Nasca. TikTok’s algorithm pushed him thousands of videos about suicide, sadness, hopelessness and loneliness, right up until he killed himself.”
My Thoughts: Do you want to know why all this haphazard legislation is happening? Do you want to know why the internet is about to become worse for everyone? Because of this stories like this. You cannot help but read this and want to go nuclear. It is a parent’s worst nightmare. It makes you want to take a hammer to every single device.
[deep breath]
TikTok is huge. It should improve. It’s the same argument I’ve been making with Roblox: you may not want your children on the platform (understandable), but because of its power and influence, we all benefit from the platforms becoming safer.
One of the big problems is scale. TikTok is treating its audience like guinea pigs, and while real-world information on real-world people is, in theory, the right move, we’re talking about millions used as an experiment. They are not hypothetical people, they are kids like Chase, whose mental health declined alongside TikTok’s algorithm.
TikTok and Roblox could have valued safety higher as they scaled. At a certain point, the scale at which these platforms operate means there will always be victims, but there don’t have to be this many. It doesn’t have to be this catastrophic. If they won’t care on their own—and we have years of hard evidence to suggest they won’t—then the platforms have to be forced to care, through relentless lawsuits and legislation.
But sadly, we’re all going to get dragged into the mud along the way.
Have a story idea? Want to share a tip? Got a funny parenting story? Drop Patrick an email.
Also:
School starts next week! Is there a month that goes by faster than August?
My nine-year-old convinced me to let her install the app Locket. It’s just a messaging app, but there’s a fancy widget that works on your home screen.
There are no parental controls, but she’s been told that I’m allowed to review who she’s added. If she adds someone without permission, it gets deleted.
Add another game to the pile of co-op games I thought I might play with my children, only to find they lost interest in playing almost immediately: Big Walk.
I've recently encountered a Parental Screen Guilt Research too, as I'm writing a Gamer's Dad Screentime Guide of sorts.
Seems that there is more to this guilt, as higher parental screen guilt predicts higher parental stress about screen time and then, less involvement or engagement in screentime activities with kids. More likely to just limit future screentime and less likely to have participatory mediation of said screentime (like watching a movie or gaming together).
Keep up the good work!